How Did You Know That Something Was Wrong?

This is a question that came up in my radio interview yesterday, and it really got me thinking! How did I know that Sophie has passed away… because I knew before I got to the hospital; I was convinced that, although I had been there 3 times during that week for the same thing, I knew that on this occasion they wouldn’t find a heartbeat, I just knew that she had died.

I do strongly believe that I had a ‘gut’ feeling on the lead up to her death, and I also feel that women should be listened to much more if they feel there is a problem… it’s just an inbuilt feeling which is hard to explain; women are very in tune with their bodies and very often they just ‘know’.

On that particular morning, when the movements had stopped and I had a ‘heavy’ sensation in my belly, I ‘knew’, and I didn’t rush to the hospital as I couldn’t bare to have it confirmed. I tried my home doppler and all I heard was an empty silence, no blood rushing through the placenta, no heartbeat… nothing… just silence. And I just ‘knew’.

Paul was trying to remain positive and it just broke my heart, because I knew that in a few hours his world would come crashing down; the children had no idea that there was a problem and that shattered my heart as I knew that I would have to tell them that their much longed for sister had passed away. My parents and Paul’s parents were so looking forward to Sophie’s birth… and I knew how devastated they would be when we told them.

So, in answer to this question, I just ‘knew’, I didn’t want to be right but I knew I was. How did you know that something was wrong? Were there any signs or symptoms? Or was it just a ‘gut feeling’?

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